Reject feminism. Submit to your husband, Taylor. You're not in charge. All right, so Taylor Swift announced today that she is engaged to Travis Kelce of the Kansas City Chiefs. The country is abuzz with it. [00:00:16] And people are generally happy. I don't really care. I like them both. I wish them good luck. But I don't know anything about their relationship. But Charlie Kirk does. Charlie Kirk has some important advice for them that I'm sure they're writing down as we speak. So let's listen and then make fun of it. [00:00:33] Maybe one of the reasons why Taylor Swift has been so just kind of annoyingly liberal over the last couple of years is that she's not yet married and she doesn't have children. I say this not sarcastically. I say this as a husband and a father. [00:00:52] Having children changes. You. Getting married changes you. Taylor Swift might deradicalize herself. She might come back down to reality. I want them to have lots of children. It teaches something about, teaches you something about yourself. [00:01:07] I've seen this happen time and time again. When people start to get married and have children, it starts to change your politics. Reject feminism. Submit to your husband. Taylor. - You're not in charge. - Why? [00:01:24] Why would she submit to her husband? Jesus. Okay. What? Jesus, indeed. Okay, so look, the old school way of thinking about it is. Well, look, the husband brings home the bacon and Travis Kelce does. He gets paid a lot of money to play football. [00:01:40] On top of that, Charlie spent like hours talking about how he's like a insurance company spokesperson. And he got her a big ring. And like, almost like he's proud of him. Okay. Way to go daddy Kelce right okay. Taylor Swift is like what 200 times richer. [00:01:55] Yeah okay. And by the way works her ass off right. So. Like, isn't this convenient? Right. So it doesn't matter what religion you're in. And this applies to a lot of religions. Okay. Conveniently, the men who run those religions go. [00:02:11] Now remember, rule number one is submit to me. Oh, right. Okay. This is pretty convenient. Reminds me of, you know, the leader of the Mormons when he came up with the rule of. Oh, I was talking to God, and he says, I can have multiple wives, [00:02:26] and I can start with my cleaning lady. It's literally what happened. The only person who didn't believe him was his wife. Okay. So she did not submit to her husband. So, anyways, it's fascinating that they're trying to go backwards in time. [00:02:43] Michael. Right. They're trying to go to an earlier era where we just got the women to shut up and stop their feminism. Vote Republican. Let us be in charge because we've done such a great job. Okay. The more they're in charge, the more we understand what Make America Great Again [00:02:59] means to all those people and why they put it on their hats and their shirts. I mean, it's that's what it was when they were happiest, when women submitted to their men. And, and, you know, we had, this sort of the structure of the family [00:03:14] and how everything you just said about the man being the breadwinner and the woman keeping house, it's it reveals itself constantly when you see it in the changing of the way we teach our history, even, you know, all of it is, is it comes out as Make [00:03:32] America Great Again in their eyes. Yeah, in their eyes. Obviously. - In their eyes, of course. - Yeah. And right now Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce are in the middle of making America great period. Through spectacular achievements in their respective fields. Right. But if Charlie had it his way, she never he said. [00:03:49] Oh 35 is way too late to get married, so she should have gotten married earlier, submitted to her husband, in which case she likely would not have been the spectacular success that she is now. Right? How does that help her? Well, that's why we can't have feminism, right? Exactly. Because it doesn't help her. It helps you, right? [00:04:05] And by the way, if you're a real man, you don't need some law out there that everyone must submit to. You know, you earn their respect. Yeah, right. So. But but if you're lazy, you don't want to earn the respect. You go, oh, I yeah, I spoke to God and he says I'm in charge. [00:04:23] And you're not. Yeah. I mean, who listens to that? Come on guys. Even outside of this context, anytime somebody says, look, I used to say this all the time about the suicide bombers, right? So. Oh, yeah, I took the guy, their manager comes in and says, oh, yeah, I talked to God. He says, you should put on a suicide belt and you're going to get to heaven. [00:04:39] Oh, that's great news. Then you put it on first. What if it's good enough for me? Why isn't it good enough for you? You're going to get to go to heaven. You told me how great it is. Why don't you go to heaven first? Anytime somebody tells you that God is talking to them, and you should do something that helps them and not you. [00:04:54] I got news for you. It's BS. Okay? Like, that's not rocket science, right. And so and look, the most important part of this is they're not an average couple. They're not anywhere near average. They're the least average couple you've ever seen. But for the average couple it's not about oh what you know, [00:05:10] religious predilections do we have. They gotta both go to work because we're under corporate rule and we don't make enough money. And so they figured out a way that we everybody's got to go to work. Everybody's got to work 40 hours, 60 hours, 80 hours. Right? And you're living in some ancient world in the 1800s. [00:05:27] Oh, my homestead will be enough to take care of us both, right? But we don't live in that world, Charlie. So this is all nonsense talk. And, Charlie. Thanks. Because when I had a kid, it made me much more progressive because it made me want to have my son grow up in a place in a country where education was about choice [00:05:47] and religion was not foisted upon you, and for him to play on an even playing field would be better for him and for the country. So, yeah, I, I, I have a totally different experience than Charlie Kirk as a father. [00:06:03] Yeah. Last thing is a surprising cameo here. Get a little what Trump said. I have to tell you, the biggest pop culture news of the year broke while we were in this cabinet meeting. Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift are engaged, and the world wants your reaction, sir. [00:06:19] Well, I wish them a lot of luck. You know I think it's I think he's a great player. I think he's a great guy. And I think that she's a terrific person. So I wish them a lot of luck. All right. Surprisingly gracious because he's taking shots at them before. [00:06:38] We'll take it. Although that is almost exactly what he said about Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell. Yeah there's that. Somebody posted post a funny thing just on this on this Taylor Swift thing to me today said it's amazing when you look at Travis Kelce because [00:06:55] nobody knew who he was before You know, Taylor Swift came along and I said to them, I hadn't I would not have been able to pick Taylor Swift out of a lineup, but I knew exactly who Travis Kelce was. - Just shows you how funny perspective is. - It is. [00:07:10] And you're both nuts. Okay. And Well I didn't I mean, yeah I mean not you know, I actually probably wouldn't have been able to pick her out of a lineup, but I, you know, there was a time where I knew who she was, but for most of her career, I didn't. Yeah. Super. Last thing. [00:07:26] You know, it's ironic because Charlie Kirk's been speaking out a lot against Muslims and Islam and in every way, recently. But what he's saying is identical to fundamentalist Muslims. We're like, women should submit to their husbands. And he's like, oh, it's terrible. We can't have that. [00:07:43] Women should submit to their husbands. Interesting. Yeah. Fundamentalist, birds of a feather flock together every time you ring the bell below. An angel gets his wings. Totally not true. But it does keep you updated on our live shows.